Schoolgirl in Armor to Appear at Switch 2 Event in October

Let’s dive into this, shall we? Nothing like getting lost in futuristic tales. “Full Metal Schoolgirl” — yeah, it sounds wild, right? I mean, when’s the last time you heard of cyborg schoolgirls taking on undead corporates in a dystopian Japan? Maybe it’s just me, but the imagery is something else. Picture this: It’s 2089, and ice cream is probably extinct. Sad, but I digress.

So, you haven’t heard any Switch 2 game announcements yet? You’re not alone. Apparently, everyone else missed the memo about tuning into the not-so-cheery future vibes from Japan. It’s kind of like humming to the wrong tune—been there, done that. But D3Publisher? They’re here to fix our oversight with the reveal of “Full Metal Schoolgirl” — mark your calendars for October 23rd.

Yuke’s, the masterminds from EARTH DEFENSE FORCE: World Brothers 2 and AEW: Fight Forever (if names like that don’t scream intense, I don’t know what does), are crafting this new chaotic adventure. When you hear “action-packed adventure with a heavy-duty attitude,” what do you picture? For me, it’s like a metal concert, but with more plot twists and, well, slightly fewer guitars.

Here’s what the fancy press release folks said: Immerse yourself in 2089—think cyberpunk Tokyo streets colliding with anime on a bad trip. Meternal Jobz runs the show, with zombi—sorry, “Working Dead”—cyborg employees who literally never clock out. How’s that for a Monday?

And our protagonist? A cyborg schoolgirl wielding weapons like the fate of humanity depends on it. Or maybe she just hates overtime. Her mission’s personal, and she’s got a skyscraper full of creepy corporate defenses to plow through. Oh, the CEO of Evil Inc. is waiting at the top — classic video game boss setup. But really, why futurize this, right? Corporate baddies are timeless.

This game’s got everything: from mechanized schoolgirls taking revenge to a 100-story building that’s more jigsaw puzzle than office tower. Ever-changing, unpredictable, a bit like my last attempt at organizing my desk — except with more undead salarymen.

Oh, and there’s live-streaming. Imagine battling, cashing in on viewers’ support, and upgrading your gear from donations. Maybe you’ll crash and burn, but hey, there’s a troop of viewers with popcorn cheering for your virtual exploits. It’s like viral fame with more stakes.

Anyway, no pre-orders yet for the Switch 2, but you can poke around the official site for tidbits, teasers, and who knows what else. It’s all very… let’s say, intriguingly chaotic.

So, are you in for October 23rd? Or just pondering if ice cream can really survive another 66 years? Not sure about you, but I’m hoping for a plot twist involving frozen desserts.