Alright, buckle up folks! So, here’s what’s cooking on Xbox this coming week. No fancy schmancy format or whatever—just me, trying to tell you what’s up.
Okay, so you’re into history? “Age of Empires II: DE – The Three Kingdoms” is hitting both consoles and PCs on May 6. Yeah, you get to clash through China with Shu, Wei, and Wu. I think it involves loads of dramatic battles and some legendary heroes, or something. There’s this romance thing—Romance of the Three Kingdoms. And also, new civilizations! Jurchens and Khitans—a little cherry on top!
Moving on, we’ve got “King Arthur: Legion IX.” Again, May 6, optimized for the new Xbox consoles. This one’s all about turn-based tactics, dark fantasy vibe, you know? A pretty neat take on the old tales of King Arthur. Fresh story and… ugh… knights, of course. Could use more dragons, if you ask me.
Next up, “Metal Eden,” also on May 6. Optimized like the rest of them. You’re a hyper-something-unit called Aska. Wonder if it ends well when you start a game that mentions a “suicide mission.” Anyway, it’s all about blasting through some deadly urban jungle, or city Moebius—I guess they thought that name sounded cool.
Oh, “Bartender Hustle” is up on May 7. Listen, who knew serving drinks could be so intense? You get to mix cocktails all night and craft your way through some… cocktail lounges? They promise a narrative-driven experience. I’ve only ever heard of cocktails on weekends.
Yet another on May 7, “Submarine Survivor.” Dive into the ocean, face some weird sea creatures… and pick up crystals? A roguelite. What even is that—some kind of jam?
“Empyreal”—set for May 8. Step into this cosmic mystery to explore a planet with an ancient Monolith. Automaton foes, civilization remnants, and some humanity-redefining revelations. Deep, right? Almost makes you ponder life’s mysteries… then you remember it’s a game.
“Penguin Flight: Beyond the Clouds” flies in on May 8 too. Expect pixel-art platforming, defying gravity as a penguin with a knack for trouble. Timing’s everything—I never was good with timing. Can barely catch a bus.
Now, “Revenge of the Savage Planet” floats through space on May 8 as well. Ding, ding! Corporate greed screws you over in space—well, nothing new for 2023. Dig through alien rocks and somehow wrangle your way back home.
Then there’s “Spirit of the North 2” on May 8. Fox and Raven adventures. Guardians to save. A dark shaman called Grimnir. Blockbuster stuff, huh? Does the fox talk? Always wondered about that.
“The Abandoned Planet,” May 8 too. Pixels, puzzles, and wormholes. Crash down, explore a mystery, feel the nostalgia. Point and click your way like it’s 1992. Must be something in these games that makes pixel adventures so endearing.
Getting trucky on May 8 with “Truck Simulator Cargo Driver 2025.” Drive across the USA. Trucks, road trips, and a whole lot of cargo to manage. Honestly, sounds therapeutic. As long as the truck doesn’t roll over.
“Amaze!” rolls in on May 9. Paint and maze puzzles. Now, I’m not saying it’s simple, but I’ve seen those mazes kids draw on restaurant menus. Could still be a tricky little palette cleanser, though.
Finally, dive into “Eyes: The Horror Game” on May 9. Haunted spots, ghostly puzzles. Collect eyes? Yep, they literally mean eyes. Creepy.
Just a jumble of excitement and weird twists, really. Catch y’all on the flip side!
